Tuesday 29 December 2015

The last seven months ......

Yes, I know, I know, I should have updated you ages ago and I'm sorry for neglecting you .....

 I realise that it's seven months since we last spoke and I left you with the news that I had shingles ....... well not only did I have to clear my diary for two weeks, I was so unwell that it was for three months ........ I've never felt so ill in my life!

Take my advice .... don't get it!

I felt like I was wasting time by not doing anything but infact I was physically incapable of doing anything and I didn't feel like doing anything either, even writing a blog post whilst lying in bed! I love reading but couldn't be bothered to pick up a book/kindle either.
It was that debilitating.

You may recall that during the bastard cancer we had to cut down on cheesemaking and whilst I had my radiotherapy we put it on hold for five weeks,
and then made the decision to just make a small amount every week so that we could fit things in like walk the dogs and run and have day dates .......

Of course we broke the rules, which is probably one of the reasons I got shingles ..... all work and no play!

For several weeks I didn't have the strength to make cheese and no cheese means no sales and as time went on it became quite clear that now was the time to give up ......

Nope! I couldn't let go ...... stupid really but it was a sense of failure and fear and maybe even in an odd way optimism that made me hang on ......

For those of you who follow my running blog, www.sarahsrunningchallenge.blogspot.com will know that I lost 11 weeks of fitness too and it took me exactly 11 weeks to get it back. Something that I found very frustrating and hard to regain.

Ok so whats happened during the other four months?  I hear you ask.

Well, on the 1st September I had an appointment with Dr.Goodman. As it wasn't until 3.20pm we decided to have a day out with lunch in Exeter, leave the car in the car park and walk to RD&E so that there were no worries about finding a space at a busy time.
We got to the clinic just before 3pm and I bought some chewing gum to disguise the fact that I'd had wine at lunch ........ I probably still reeked like a brewery!!!

There were two clinics running but neither were with Dr. Goodman ......

At 3.30pm I was called in, put on the fetching gown and before OH had time to start fiddling with anything Dr. Nassau came in .......

He was pleasant enough, although rather took me aback during the shingles conversation ........

'Why did it take you so long to get over it?

Well I don't fucking know you're the Doctor was what I wanted to say but instead mumbled

'I don't know ..... I suppose I had a bad case of it'

OH was apparently silently shouting 'you're the Doctor it's fucking obvious why'

So after a couple of questions including

 ' ..... and you're getting on with Tamaxifen alright?' A sort of rhetorical question I felt as I nodded.

Periods weren't even mentioned,  he then had a feel of my boobs and that was it ....... the closest to being on time and the shortest ever oncology appointment!

My next Oncology appointment is 30th August 2016!

So next on the update list is of course Tamoxifen .......

Well it's good news as for the last seven months the pharmacist has got me Wockhardt each time and so I'm on an even keel, with only the the odd night sweat which is mild in comparison to the ones I was having with the other brands.

Periods?????!!!!!

What do you think?

Of course yes!!

On 1st October we made our last batch of cheese ......

 Yup, I finally let go ..... and no, I don't miss it but maybe that's because we now have a new business ..... making and selling vegetarian and vegan food!

Well you didn't think I was going to take it too easy did you?